Wow, I really did not like this movie??? Which was annoying, as I really wanted to love it? I mean, my beloved Tom Hardy was in it! What's not to love? Um, pretty much everything????
The first twenty minutes--Actually, this entire movie is just like one never-ending car chase and I am disgusted but okay. Like what actually happened? What was the plot? Ummm let's see. Something about people needing water? There's a guy named Immortan Joe, I guess? Breast milk factories??? Hmmm a character named Furiosa has...kidnapped or rescued a bevy of virgin bitches or something? Or, not virgins? One was definitely pregnant...so some info clearly went over my head. Okay, and then there's some dude named Max. He was like a prisoner of a bunch of steampunk skinheads, I guess? I feel like they were stealing his blood, or putting magical shit in his blood to get him revved up for some fucking war?
Okay...so...none of that is a plot. Literally the movie opens with a long ass car chase. Then there's a break for Furiosa and her bevy of hoes to...chill? Until Max shows up and they fight him but then eventually start working with him for whatever reason. And then we're back to car chases. Eventually we reach Furiosa's fam and they tell her the green place or whatever doesn't exist anymore. Max is all "let's go back to where we just came from" and, so, they do? And that's a long ass car chase? A bunch of people get killed. That pregnant one I actually liked got killed. Wait did she get killed on the way there or the way back? On the way there? Doesn't matter. Violent Car chase to, violent car chase back. The movie ends with the car chase pulling up to a crowd of people. They get excited to hear the king is dead, I guess? Then Furiosa and Max stare at each other. There's an implied sequel. Will I watch? Yep. Sigh.
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