All Eyez on Me (2017)

Hmmm. Maybe I liked this? I'm only a fan of Tupac, the Actor and all I really know about him is that he was good and I'm annoyed he's dead because he could've been a major movie star. But like I don't know all about his life, too much of what he was about (had no idea Thug Lyfe was some insane acronym), or really anything about his music. I knew he was the baby of a militant Black Panther member, so I assumed certain things, and then also I've seen him in interviews and things, but only when I was younger, so whatever significant messages I was meant to receive went right over my head. I have always been Team Tupac concerning the whole Biggie vs Tupac thing. Why? Mostly because Pac was cuter lol. And Biggie gave me bad vibes when I was a kid. But maybe that was just Diddy hovering over him stealing his soul. Anyway, all this mostly incomprehensible mess is to say...I watched All Eyez on Me and I wasn't offended lol like I would think...anyone who knew Tupac personally, or even a die hard fan of his would be. This was definitely a kind of...Starter Biopic, you know? Like, for people who knew of this famous man named Tupac and were interested and would like some tea and also some basic background filled in. I can't imagine a Tupac stan would watch this movie having gained new insight, but maybe they would get something out of...getting to see him alive again, but like in some lesser, not as magnetic form? 

Speaking of Great Value versions of superior shit. So Demetrius Shipp Jr!! Kind of sometimes looked exactly like Tupac and also captured his essence occasionally. Like when he was talking to those two white dudes at Interscope, I was really forgetting I wasn't watching actual Tupac. And there were several other moments sprinkled throughout where I would forget it wasn't really him. But there were a lot of times where it was like...lol. You know? Like, this is so not Tupac. Also Demetrius has a rounder face. Like, Tupac was fine as shit and kind of chiseled face-wise. Also what I've always thought about him was that he looked older than his age. Like Tupac only lived twenty-five years but he died looking like some dude who lived almost twice that. Demetrius had this little baby face that kind of took me out of the film at times. Like, he looked like an actor they'd get for those reenactments they do for true crime/ID type shows. Like just some goofy goober version of the actual person. Lol especially when he had hair. Smh. All in all, though--wait, I was about to lowkey praise Demetrius for doing a mostly good job, but I almost felt he ruined the big Bishop moment in Juice. Maybe it wasn't him, per say, but the director choosing to show a close-up of Demetrius as Tupac doing Bishop. That was a mistake, and Juice is such a huge thing for me lol and Bishop is iconic so maybe don't ever do that again :') But I think Demetrius did a good job? But again I wouldn't consider myself a Tupac stan even though I loved him as an actor. Like, I'm detached from his whole big thing, so maybe people who were more passionate about him would heartily disagree lol.

You know who I thought was kind of good but did not at all think they would be? Kat Graham. I really felt she was capturing Jada's essence at times? When I first heard who was cast as Mrs. Pinkett-Smith, I was like...Lol... You know? Like Kat looks nothing like her lol. HOWEVER, watching the whole performance in motion, I was kind of getting into her. Kat isn't so amazing she was able to convince me she looked like Jada, but I was seeing some Jada in there. She's a pretty specific person, I think, and I think Kat was really trying to nail it and was mostly successful, so that was cool. Okay so now let's get into juicy gossip and let's discuss Jada and Tupac. 

I just accept Jada as a lesbian, so like, I won't get too into Why didn't she and Tupac ever get together. You know? Like, maybe there was this huge roadblock called NOT INTERESTED IN DICK. I do wonder...how Jada ended up with someone like Will. But maybe she wanted...something kind of different from what she was. I get the impression Jada was kind of wild back in the day. I think she admitted this herself, so this isn't mostly me being all dishy or whatever. But...also I hear stuff about her daughter writing a letter talking about how Jada is so sad Tupac is dead and she wishes he would come back so her mother could be happy and I just wonder what that relationship was. It's barely touched on in the film. Ultimately, did Tupac friend-zone Jada? lol no it's not funny, but did he?? Did she him?? This movie did not give me all the tea I required. BUT I HEARD JADA'S BOUT TO WRITE A BOOK ABOUT HIM SO IT'S BOUT TO BE EXTRA LITTY ANNNNNNNNDDDDDD I WISH I WASN'T LIKE THIS :')

Can we talk about Tupac just glossing over misogyny??? Lol I was hoping for a clear answer from him even if I disagreed with it, but he gave me nothing. The reporter dude asked him about those civil rights old heads denouncing his music because it was "obscene", but it was clearly, specifically, the women, who were obviously against the bitches and hoes type of thing. Tupac was all, Don'T Go On TV & Talk Shit Until You Discuss With Us First. No offense, but first of all: Who are you? Why do they need to do that? And why would they if they feel you have no respect for them? Like I love Tupac, but like extremely hesitantly because he seems whack concerning women. Maybe I shouldn't love him lol. He's so magnetic please!! 

So like what was all that rape shit?? So the movie--LOL OKAY!! No, it's not funny because it's a serious subject matter, BUT LOOK. Look. The movie expects me to believe that while some groupie thottie was giving Tupac a back rub, he deaded it in the middle and decided to go sleep in another room? And then all of a sudden out of nowhere this broad is bursting into his room claiming those other dudes did something to her and it's Pac's fault for leaving her with them?? I don't necessarily believe Tupac raped anyone because I don't get those vibes from him. Now he absolutely could have and fuck vibes lol, I'm just saying that I'm not saying he did anything. It's just this story sounds really fucking stupid. If he really wasn't feeling ol' girl why did he accept the massage at first? Like wasn't she lowkey stalking and harassing him? YOU KNOW. This story could be completely true because Tupac seemed lowkey stupid. Like really smart, but like a lot of really smart people, they often have these major blindspots in ~common sense~ areas?? Like he would still be alive if he was more mediocre-brained and his intelligence was more evened out, jus sayin'. Like why would you link up with Nigel and those dudes? Is it that the movie did not explain this well, or was Tupac just wildly...not street smart? Like he was just some dorky theater kid and was WAY over his head dealing with real street people. It's sad as hell.

So who killed Pac? Pretty sure it was Diddy, but let's just say it was this Nigel dude. Why? Because Pac called him a hanger-on? Um, you were? Also why did Pac have to do time for just being associated with you? But Pac shoulda just realized his mistake fucking with them, did his time, and then come out completely removed from that. He was always talking shit lol and then also he signed with Shug and I don't understand...why. Why wasn't Tupac thinking of starting his own thing way sooner? Couldn't he have put out his own shit and had just as much success? Did he really need the ~protection~? Like couldn't he have just separated himself from all that shit he was doing before he went to prison? Idk, man! I'm just mad he's dead :( Hope he wasn't a rapist :/

Can we talk about that Snoop voice-over shit?!?!?!?!?!?!,!, WHYYY!! So funny omg. So...fucking out of place. I felt like I was watching BET (NEVER A GOOD THING). It was so funny tho lowkey I loved it lol. Also I appreciated a character in the film I could truly relate to. Snoop's blasé skinny ass with that fro talking bout he homies with everyone. So me. Like, butter my bread on both sides, thank you! Lol @ him getting that knife when he was on the plane. Iconic, and VERY ME. It's so funny how Snoop is still alive when he was playing both sides like that during such a charged time. Iconic nonchalantry. 

Okay so acting stand-outs? I want to say Danai Gurira, but lowkey I felt she was doing the most lol. Like a sketch comedy impression of Viola Davis. I was like...child. But at the same time she lit up the screen, and my ass loves ott acting, so I'm not gonna complain lol. Cory Hardrict was good as the mysterious Nigel. When he told that dude to never get in his face again or he'd bite his nose off I was already preparing his Academy Award speech in my head for him. Greatest performance of 2017. I also loved...randomly, Pinky from Friday After Next lol no learn his name, Thurston Charles or some shit (Clifton Powell smh). Soon as he showed up at the prison I was excited. It was like a whole different movie lol he was barely in it but it kind of wrongly highlighted how maybe this movie isn't...good?

NOOOO!! It's okay lol. It's okay. I enjoyed it. I didn't think I would because I had read some reviews and most of them were frowny face. This was being compared to Str8 Outta Compton and...that movie is def better. But not by too much, so everyone calm down. The beginning of the movie was very shitty lol. Then once Tupac is older it starts to pick up, but it still had these cheesy ass Zoom vibes or something. I just watched that New Edition miniseries and this...this was pretty in-line with that lol and...like, that's a TV movie, so... But I saw All Eyez in theaters and a lot of times I regret seeing a movie in theaters, like, I coulda waited to see this shit on Netflix. But I don't regret paying to see this on the big screen and so I think that's a thumbs up review from me (this isn't a good movie lol). It was entertaining and I didn't know too much about Tupac's life, so it gave me some knowledge crumbs. I'm a sucker for biopics, though, so I might be biased. Also I love Juice and Poetic Justice and that movie he did with Tim Roth and Thandie Newton and now I have to see Above the Rim. You know what this movie also did? It kind of made me want to listen to Tupac's music? I'm not too into rap. I listen to like...three rap people and all of them make my ass itch in various ways. Would Tupac's? He has ~conscious~ music, but I don't give a fuck about that shit lol. But then he has weird shit like "California Love" which I wanna bop to, but also it gives me fraudulent teas. Why is your child of a Black Panther, from NY and Baltimore ass making music like this?? Is that an unfair criticism? Whatever I'm finna go stream it.