American Horror Story: Copz

So right away, True D seaz 2 is inferior to season 1. 

Two important things it's missing: 

1. Rust

2. Louisiana setting. 

Like, it's way too early to be complaining, but for sure this season is going to be not as good. I had low expectations going in, though, so I'm not going to be too disappointed. As soon as casting rumors and news started popping off for the second season I knew this mess would be a disaster. I forget who the earliest contenders were (I think Colin's name was always being bandied about??), but once I heard Vince Vaughn's name, I began to check out emotionally. And then when the cast became more concrete in its vauge horribleness, and uninspired super-whiteness, I was just like..."sigh, I'm still gonna watch, tho." 

Despite me being like "ugh, okay" at most of the casting, I was really excited about Colin Farrell, whom I am a fan of mostly. I was like, yes, eyebrows! I figured he'd be putting his eyebrows to angsty, tortured cop use, which he does! So, yay! When the show first started off, though, with him...like, I...wasn't excited. Why does he have some random fat ginger child??? Are you telling me swarthy ass Colin Farrell gave birth to that??? Oh, maybe something will come out about it not being his kid?? lol, please do that because omg. So anyway at first I was disgusted with him playing like ~good dad~ and having an ~*~AMerIKIN aCCent~**~ and being like sad because...something happened with his wife, I think?? I was just underwhelmed with all of that and having flashbacks to Rust sitting in the police station with his dingy, limp ass ponytail, spouting all that depressing existenstial bullshit...and I just wanted to throw up for missing anything Matthew McConaughey, you know?? BUT EVENTUALLY Colin's character popped off and I was sooo happy and felt relief. Like thank god I'm not going to have to watch an entire season of him playing like a ~~grieving single dad~~. Hopefully I'll be watching an entire season of him yelling at his son for losing his Lebrons, and beating up little twink boys named Aspen. CAN WE TALK ABOUT

1. WHEN COLIN ASKED HIS SON IF THOSE BULLIES SHIT ON HIS SHOES? LOL WHERE THEFCK DID THT FUCOEE CUCMEM FROROMM. I'm screaming, he was like snatching the little boy up by his shirt like, "What did they do - shit on them?!!?" lol how did we come to that conclusion? I'm completely done.

2. WHEN HE ROLLED UP TO ASPEN'S HOUSE WITH THOSE FUCKING BRASS KNUCKLES AND I THOUGHT HE WAS GONNA BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF THAT KID??!?! I'm a little disappointed this show didn't Degrassi: The Next Generation style go there with him beating the shit out of Aspen. Like he just beat up Aspen's daddy. Sigh, like, I loved it, but I would have loved it more had he just killed Aspen, you know??? What is with the holding back sigh what am I watching fucking ABC get with the fucking program HBO sigh that's why I love Showtime more sigh

I think I'm excited about Rachel McAdams' character? I like Rachel as an actress, but I've been underwhelmed with shitty roles she's been given/taken. I hope she turns the fuck up in this show. I can see it happening, but I'll wait. I like the hardness of her character and the chip on her shoulder. The haircut is really bringing it home. WHAT WAS SHE DOING TO THAT DUDE IN THE BEDROOM???? I feel like Rachel is the one character that is giving me hope that the season will actually...improve as it goes on. Like maybe they'll have a really nice storyline for her, but just as easily they could fuck up and get really cliché and corny with it, as they sort of a little bit did last season at the end??? Mmmm I'm hoping for the former, that they'll really unravel her in a beautifulish way hopefully. But oh god like I said lol it'd be just so easy for them to unravel her into some cliché fucking tortured, toxic ass relationship with Colin annnnnnd like...omg that's totally happening right? Like, there's maybe a way to make that not be embarrassing but lol. But lol at me thinking they won't go the worst, most obvious route. No, but I'll wait!! I'll wait!! I'm being optimistic! New year, new me!! It's fucking June but okay!! 

Taylor Kitsch. What's the deal? I don't really know this dude. Never watched Friday Night Lights, and of course, I never fucking saw John Carter of Mars or Battleship or whatever the fuck else he's done. So I haven't really seen him in things. Is he a good actor? He seems too white and like...ex-Calvin Klein model for me to think he is, but no, I'LL WAIT. I think...I could see myself getting interested in whatever he was referring to about the desert. Right, that's what he said? Like, he got that burn scar on his shoulder from something in his childhood, I think? So that could maybe get interesting? Check no Juliet to his ~*~war past~*~, though. Spare me his Restrepo documentary filming war flashbacks, okay? But yeah, I'll be here for some weird, horrible child abuse history. 

I can't tell...what I feel about the three ~main cops~ getting together on this case. CAN WE TALK ABOUT THAT STARE-OFF THAT HAPPENED WITH THEM. LIKE THEY HAD TO MAKE THAT LATINO COP WALK AWAY WITH AN ATTITUDE SO THE WHITE COPS COULD STARE EACH OTHER DOWN IN PEACE?!?! lol can we also talk about the lack of latinos when this shit takes place in L.A., which is 95% Mexicans or???r?????? lol you gave me one bitch at the bar looking like that wolf bitch from Twilight, and then Rachel's partner. Oh, and Taylor's girlfriend, who spent the whole time in bed. LOL THUMBS UP DIVERSITY. come on. No, BUT I'LL WAIT.

What I'm 100% NOT HERE FOR? Vince Vaughn. And whatever the fuck Kelly Reilly is doing. SPARE ME PLEASE at all of that. Like, there's a chance their characters could become significantly less annoying, horrible, and grotesquely dull over the season, but how many episodes do they have to greatly improve - 10? Come on I'm not waiting til episode 9 to finally be like "eh, Vince V's not so bad now, not so bad. Giving me Clay Pigeons tease~ Not. soooo. baaaaad.". Like, no, this is an anthology series, everything has to be turned the fuck up to 11 right away on the first episode. You can't slowly unravel compelling facets of a character, that's now how this type of show works. Like, this isn't Boardwalk Empire, you're not getting five seasons to get me to try to care about some boring ass piece of shit (Nucky, lookin @ you). You get ten episodes (I think), let's gooooo!!! 

So I'm not impressed. I'm feeling...wary. I was worried going in this wouldn't be as good as season 1 and...got a very fucking quick confirmation that it wasn't going to be. However, there's potential for goodness, and unfortunately that's all I need to keep watching. Yo, that's how Dexter trapped me. *shudders*