Brooklyn Nine-Nine

So every time I see Andy Samberg I think about that episode of The Eric Andre Show where he started going off on Eric because he called him unprofessional or told him to get his shit together or something and was like "How do you expect to get work in this industry" something along those lines I'm ruining it blah, and Andy popped off like "I'm doing better than you!" and still to this day I have no idea if that was acting or real but I think it was real like it was so organic and Andy Samberg is so fucking mediocre in every way except for his amazing comb teeth, that it just seems like he'd be insecure enough to be acting a straight fool on some twelve-minute long Adult Swim monstrosity/life-saver. 

So anyway, I don't like Andy lol. I used to be into The Lonely Island back in the sole year I decided to do college, like Barbie trying on one of her career outfits. It was like, okay, yesterday I had on my construction hat and Barbie™ Timbs, today I'll put on my Barbie™ College Sweater and Barbie™ Trademarked Frat Boy Rape Preventer/Chastity Belt. And like of course I never went to class. I was in my dorm all day binging Netflix and Hulu, and watching shit on utube, etc.

I wasn't even really, really into The Lonely Island, I mostly just thought Jorma was cute. I was way more of a College Humor bitch and like obsessed with Jake & Amir or Ace & Jocelyn or whatever. But The Lonely Island snuck in there somewhere and thus so did Andy. I think he was on SNL by that point and I was really into several...or like three things he did I think. For some reason, that "Iran So Far Away" video, some other video I can't remember????, annnnd his Mark Wahlberg Talks To Animals skit. So I guess I thought he was funny? But I started watching SNL more around that period and I realized I lowkey did not like him? There was just something...very flatline about him. Also there were so many more talented comedic actors and writers (lol) and etc around him that he just stuck out as mad mediocre. Also he's married to Joanna Newsom and that's MY wife, not his! 

Anyway!!!!!! when he left SNL I was like "good", but then he got B99. When I first saw the trailers for the show I was like  "ugh, gross". There was so much focus on him and it looked mad unfunny and lame as shit. Idk what made me give it a try. I guess good reviews? Chelsea Peretti? Prob Chelsea Peretti? I think I was listening to her podcast around that time and getting really into her kill me :')? Idk, but Chelsea is bæ so it was def a motivator. Also the show was getting a lot of good reviews. This doesn't really mean anything, but if a show I initially was grossed out by starts getting positive hype it makes me want to watch it despite my initial mountain dew code red eXtreem disgust. 

So I started watching it and I pretty much liked it. Obviously I love Gina and die anytime she isn't on screen? I love Gina, I lovvve Boyle, he is so cute and I just feel like...fully realized as a character maybe? I just feel like his characterization goes mad deep lol and I just love him. Boyle is bae. Who else? HOLT, OBVIOUSLY. Holt is ultra-bae like Andre Braugher fucking kills me with his deadpan and blank (blank) face like literally any of his scenes and lines are everything I could ever need? And please end my life when there's scenes with just Holt and Gina lol like can they just be the show or no we're not doing that FINE. 

Ummmmmm. Okay. Sooooooooo. I started watching this back in 2013 or whatever when it first aired and I think I watched the whole of the first season, and then for season2 I kind of fell off. I don't think it's cuz I lost interest, it's just I am always watching so much shit on so many different platforms that I get distracted, lose focus and attention, etc, so I fall off shit a lot. Like if this is not the most first world problems ass non-problem. But it happens. Like I still need to finish recapping Peep Show, I need to see like two seasons of Rectify, gotta finish Oh My Venus, gotta watch the last seaz of Penny Dreadful, gotta finish The White Queen and Mad Fat Diary, gotta force myself through the last seas of Girls, still haven't watched the series finale of The Borgias,  have like two seasons of Bad Girls Club I half-finished, haven't seen The Mindy Project since like 2014 or some shit even though it was one of my fave shows lol le sigh like it's a mess. And b99 was just one of those shows that got lost in the sauce pleaz delete my blog @blogspot, thanx. 

But recently I scammed a free Hulu trial and I've been wasting it ENORMOUSLY. But I have tried to get back into b99. I made the mistake of starting it from the beginning. Kinda wished I had just came in on where I left off but I forgot where, so...I just started all over. Regret, regret, because it was kind of lame the second time around. Don't get me wrong this show is funny, but not that funny. Like when I watch a comedy show I want it to be REALLY funny. Like b99 can be, but it's more haha, than me crying tears like I would if I was watching something horrible like It's Always Sunny pleez. Or Veep. Veep be killing me. Peep Show slays my seoul. American Dad. Curb Your Enthusiasm...other stuff I can't remember because I feel mad pressure to remember it like literally no one ever asks me to write or do any of this smh. 

But anyway I don't be like guffawing or screaming or whatever while watching B99, but it's still funny. Uhhh this show is done by those Parks & Rec people, no? I had this same kind of unexplainable issue with Parks & Rec, too, where it was like, for me, funny...but also not?? Not in the way I want a comedy show to be? Also the saccharine-ness of Parks really irked me lol. Like April & Andy was weird?? How they kept trying to make Ann happen?? Uh and a bunch of other stuff. I think maybe I have an issue with optimism? I mean, yeah, prob - I'm a Negative Nancy. I like fucked up dark shit where characters only get progressively worse. Or they start out really bad and just stay that way and it's funny cuz they shit? 

Positive comedy does not wholly bother me, it just does not completely keep my interest, and even trying to binge the series on Hulu I started getting bored. Like midway through my ~binge sesh~ I decided to watch Loiter Squad. And now I kinda want to check out Please Like Me, and Difficult People. Idek if they will be more interesting to me than b99, it's just the point is that I am not interested in b99. Or as much as I need/want to be? 

Also I hate that Jake is kind of the focus? I don't like Samberg and I don't like Jake lol and I espesh kinda want to vomit @ his little will they won't they bs with Amy. I only barely care about Amy. I hate when shows try to do a romance thing with characters I don't too much be fucking ever really thinking about like that. I was way more interested in the scenes they didn't show with Boyle and Linetti getting together lol like. And then fine, even Jake on his own I'm like...enough. Give me more Holt, give me more Gina, more Boyle, shit even more Hitchcock and Scully in the background saying concerning shit. I like Diaz but her shit gets old, so I don't need more of that. Don't need more of Strong Man Daddy Terry. But def more of Gina talking about Richard Dreyfuss "hunkered over eating dog food". Sigh, I might need to continue watching just for my bae. Like I need more excellent and soul-crushing one liners such as this. I don't want to completely give up because this show has a lot of pros but sigh it's like if you're not fully into it... Idk, maybe I'll go back I really love Gina but anyway can Chelsea Peretti get her own show or?? Omg what if she and Jordan did like some shitty sitcom about their life PLEASE AMERICA PLEEEEEEZ STOP PLAYING GAMES I WANT THISSS NOW!!!!