Girls, seaz 5

So I took a hiatus from watching Girls for a bit. I wish it was because I hate Lena Dunham or some other very acceptable reason such as that, but nah, I fell off on a lot of my TV shows that I watch...the TV way. Been streaming a lot. But I recently got a free trial of HBO NOW (kill me), so I finally watched season 5 and literally no one asked or cares :')

Um. I don't remember too much about season 4, just that I hated it?? Or liked it less than previous seasons. But tbh, I doubt it was any worse than prior seasons, I just was in a different frame of mind when I started watching Girls, that I am no longer in. Short story: significantly less impressed with bad-bodied white feminists. But I still--I don't want to say I enjoy watching, lol, but maybe I do? Idk, I just feel like enjoy is the wrongest word. Almost any other word would be better. Sepulchral. I sepulchral watching.

So, bitch, GUESS WHAT?!?!? Adam and Jessa are FINALLY together and I want to throw up and die. This is my dream! Wow, that is super-sad!! But I have been waiting for this and omg it's sew cute! Is that okay to say? lol, it's Adam and Jessa. They are both such a mess, but that's why they're a perfect match! It's so cute it's so cute!! Pleeeeeeeeeez. lol. I will cry (no) if Lena breaks them up final season. Bitch better not play games or I will run up on her Little Critter looking ass and I am skreaming @ someone on the interwebz pointing out that she looks like that. Why can't people be nice lol. Too much work, moving on! 

So, I don't like...how...Jessa and Adam are being framed. The whole thing. You know what kept annoying me? Hannah being like Are they fucking? Jessa and Adam are fucking, etc. Bitch, no - they're boyfriends! They're raising a child together, you stupid bitch. Casual sex friends don't pay for college tuitions, bitch! They are longtime companions, ho! Bitch when Jessa said (screamed) even if she died beside Adam in bed she'd never forgive him, I was like awwww lol. It was so romantic <3 uwu lol, smh. 

But I don't like how it's being set up like...Jessa stole Hannah's boyfriend. First of all, no. Hannah and Adam are no longer 2gether, and haven't been for a minute? And that's it basically. Imo, they're treating this like a way bigger deal than it is. These are grown people, or they're supposed to fucking be anyway. This isn't middle school. Two consenting grown adults can do whatever or whomever the fuck they want, bearing, it's, like, within legal bounds. Miss me with all that JESSA BETRAYED HANNAH bullshit, like Hannah owns these people. Smh they can do as they damn well please, and bitch if you had literally anything going on, they would be a non-factor to you. Also, if you love these people like you vaguely claim you do, shouldn't you be happy for them? I'm not gonna play dumb and act like this wouldn't exactly happen this way in real life, I'm just saying it's dumb when it does. What was not realistic, however, was Hannah's reading. It wasn't funny or good, and when her mom put up her ten fingers, I knew she had died inside long ago. Typical beard teas. 

Aside from that Adam and Jessa drama, what all else did Hannah's annoying ass have going on? Sucking Ray's flaccid peenus (no), uh flashing her weird vagina @ her boss (DOUBLE NAHHH!!!!), uh, oh and some boyfriend drama. lol, I don't even remember her bf's name. This is so funny because I didn't remember his character's name in Obvious Child either lol. He is so boring I'm screaming. 

I don't know...how I feel...about Hannah making it like...oh, his niceness is a mask for his anger. I guess it was a stab at the ~nice guy~ trope. But he did genuinely seem okay? lol. Plus, anyone dating Hannah...like, Hannah could be dating a golden retriever puppy and like in two weeks it's drinking in the street and kicking chihuahuas in the head, just cuz. I feel like that's the affect she has on people. She's beyond annoying, and anyone would spaz being with her. But side-eye at Unnamed White Boy for even dating her. Like, what's wrong with him, huh? Screaming tho @ the handwritten letter his brother wrote about how rude Hannah is lol. I hope to inspire sum1 to write such a letter about me someday :') I love having a dream.  

They brought Christopher Abbott's ambiguously raced ass back and I am truly screaming. Didn't he talk shit about Lena and the show lol? Was that a real thing or just unconfirmed gossip? Either way, it definitely happened. Marnie is so dumb, for real. Why would she go anywhere with him? And then he was acting mad shady. lol did he set her up to get robbed? That wasn't addressed, but, he did, right? Idk, but that whole shit was iconic just to highlight how dumb and no purpose-having Marnie is. She is so embarrassing but her character remains entertaining to me. Actually everyone except Shoshanna (later). I'm excited she's divorcing that creepy dude (skreeming @ him saying she'd end up murdered, tho. Sooooo true.), but not excited their music is popping off. But what is going on with her and Ray? I am so...grossed out. So...she had a dream about brushing his hair and came? Gross. And I am not shipping them. They are not cute like Jessa and Adam, stop. 

Anyway, Shoshanna. Everything involving the Japan stuff was offensive. Moving on, Shoshanna could be written off the show and literally no one would care. 

Can't wait til the horribleness of season 6, the final seaz, oui? It better be lit. Don't end it with some weird shit like a wedding, or Hannah running down the turnpike to a fucking Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeros song. Make it a Tinashe song. All hands on deck! omg have Hannah jumping off the TCM cruise to all hands on deck!! All hands off deck lol!!!!!