Eye for an Eye (1996)

I remember watching this movie all the time when I was a kid. I was a child raised by TV and haha you can totally tell haha!! Like, I'm sick, deranged, and Sally Field is my mommy :) I didn't really remember specifics of this movie, though. Because seriously the last time I watched this I was probably 10 and there was like a marathon of Sally Field movies on TNT or some shit. Is that a thing TNT has ever done? Like, probably. Like, why wouldn't they???? Sally Field is amazing! It should be Sally Field marathon day every day! Not just once randomly in 2000!! But anydoodle! All I remember from this film was a man smashing an ice sculpture over a woman's head. I did not remember that man was horrible Kiefer Sutherland, or that you don't actually get to see anyone's face get bashed in with an ice sculpture - but okay! I was excited to re-watch this just based on the very poor memory I had of the film. I regret being excited, because the movie pops off really quickly with Sally Field crying and screaming in a fucking traffic jam asking people if she can use their car phone because her daughter is being murdered on the other line and she needs to phone the police. 

LOOK AT THIS! LOOK. AT. THIS. SHIT.

This scene like five minutes into the fucking movie completely decimated me and I was just feeling really uncomfy getting into my feelings. Her--The other thing I didn't remember about the movie was that Sally Field's daughter was quite young. She's like a teen and I think she has braces and she has this stutter and she's so cute and I just really did not remember she was basically a kid. For some reason I was remembering a woman in like her twenties getting her head bashed in, and for some reason that...makes it better that I was excited to...see it again?? But yeah, she's a kid. And I think Sally calls her from the car like "I'm gonna be late xoxo" and literally as she's talking to her, Kiefer Sutherland rings the doorbell. Sally's daughter answers the door and you immediately hear like struggling sounds and cries for help or whatever CAN YOU FUCKING IMAGINE BEING ON THE OTHER END OF THE LINE?? Being like "uhhh...", or if you're more human-like, you react akin to Sally FREAKING THE FUCK OUT. The terrible thing about this scene is that it had me being like: "um, hang up...and then cal..l..91..1???" Like...I get that she didn't want to hang up on her daughter, but she totally wasted valuable calling 911 time going car to car trying to get people to let her use their phones. Their fucking car phones because this is fucking 1996. Do you think Sally's daughter would have survived had this happened in present-day and she had a cellphone? No, because she still would've been a dumb ass and stayed on the line instead of hanging up to call 911. In short, it's Sally's fault her daughter ends up murdered as heck.

No, but in all seriousness, -__-, this movie goes way too fucking hard, way too soon. Like, they do not ease you in at all. Immediately after the screaming in traffic scene with Sally Field doing her Best Actress Oscar best and not getting fucking nominated because the academy is made up of a bunch of fucking morons who only vote for shit when they get screenerS??? Um, 0kaaaY??, they have...I think a scene at the police station with Joe Mantegna as the cop and Sally and Ed Harris as the parents asking questions and getting no answers and Sally is crying and immediately I note that Ed's face is as dry as his bald fucking head. Which I don't think is actually bald here? It's weird seeing Ed Harris not be bald. Like watching early Bruce Willis films and he has that...stuff on his head lol. And you're like, no, Bruce, just stop it. But anyway!!!!! Ed's face in this scene is as dry and dusty and bare as Bruce Willis' scalp current-day. Actually, that's not an accurate comparison because Bruce keeps his scalp fairly well-oiled, so let me not be out here accusing this nigga of having dry scalp. I don't want to be sued for defamation lol but people would actually have to read this blog...to know if...I was defaming them sigh. SO ED IS NOT CRYING IN THIS SCENE. And immediately I'm like, "Why the lack of tears, Edward?" And then directly after that someone refers to him as the dead chick's "stepfather" and I'm like "lol oh". IS THAT REALLY WHY HE WASN'T CRYING, THOUGH????? HE CAN'T CARE ABOUT HER AS MUCH AS HE WOULD A DAUGHTER HE BIRTHED FROM HIS OWN DICK????? OR WAS HE NOT CRYING BECAUSE HE'S A ~~MAN~~ AND MEN DON'T CRY??? LIKE WHY WASN'T HE MORE UPSET OMG THIS BOTHERED ME SO MUCH LOL AND I'M SITTING WATCHING LIKE "HE DID IT!" LIKE THIS IS A FUCKING WHODUNNIT BUT IT'S NOT, KIEFER SUTHERLAND IS OBVIOUSLY THE CULPRIT LOL BUT THEN I TRIED TO...LIKE...MAKE UP SOME SCENARIO...LIKE MAYBE ED HIRED KIEFER??? BUT NO...HE'S JUST SOME RANDOM LIKE CRIMINALLY RAPIST MURDERER TYPE DUDE AND ED HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT BUT WHHYYYY ISN'T HE MORE SAD HIS FUCKING STEPDAUGHTER WAS MURDERED THIS IS HORRIFYING WTF?!?!!

So, lol, idk. Then later they're at the house and the alive daughter is asking where the dead daughter is and I'm like OMG. But they don't even face the question in the scene. They just like gloss over it, and then later on in the movie it's just assumed she knows. BUT HOW DID THEY TELL HER HER SISTER WAS KILLED??? That would've been an interesting piece of dialogue to see unfold in a scene like wtf. Why did they chicken out sigh I'm annoyed. Like I give this movie credit for mostly not chickening out overall, but the most, I guess, risky scene they could have included in the film, they didn't. Like imagine telling your kid the other one was raped/murdered and now they're dead and they'll never be alive again. Of course, you'd sweeten it while explaining it to a kid, but I want to see how!! Like, no, I'm still annoyed they didn't tackle this on-screen. AND I TOTALLY FORGOT ALL THIS WENT DOWN ON THE LITTLE GIRL'S BIRTHDAY UNTIL SHE MENTIONS IT LATER. Like!! So many things you could've done with the little girl's reactions to this shit! Maybe they didn't trust the child actress would deliver, but totally I felt like they thought putting harrowing scenes involving a small child like that would be going too far. Ugghhh, I'm not mad, just disappointed. 

So I loved Sally's spazzing and unhingedness after the murder. I loved her going crazy at that garden place with the daughter WAIT CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW ANNOYING ED HARRIS WAS TELLING HER TO CALM DOWN AND SHIT??? AND ALSO WITH THE PILLOW?!?!? Like he got on my nerves because he honestly straight-up felt like he didn't have to be as devastated because she wasn't his bio kid. And then later Sally says how he doesn't understand because she wasn't his daughter and I'm like  "yes, brutal truths up in this bitch!!" and Ed has the audacity to get upset. Like, SHE WAS MY DAUGHTER, TOO! I'M SAD, TOO! Yet, you refuse to shed a single tear, Eddie. Face dry as your damn acting. lolnojk, your acting is...you're a fine actor. Just, you didn't care really all that much about ol' stutter lips getting killed, so don't front. Okay??

Kiefer's charges are dropped because of some lawyer fuck-up bullshit. BUT HOW THE EFF?!?! THIS NIGGA KILLED A BITCH!!! Whatchu mean charges dropped?!?!??! Yo, I was so mad. And then he makin' eyes at Sally and shit!! Ed finally does something that doesn't make me question his entire character, and attacks Kiefer in the courthouse. But he prolly only did that shit cuz earlier I was askin' where the tears at. He's fake, and I'm here to expose his bald ass. 

After Kiefer gets off with fucking raping and killing Sally's main bitch, she decides to take the law into her own fucking hands. Well, sort of. At first she's just stalking this nigga. WHICH IS DUMB. She had no plans beyond, "okay I'll put on a hat and follow this nigga around while he delivers groceries and more rapes". Like, what was the plan if he saw you?? Which he did??? And all you did was drive away?!?! Um, okay???? Like, are you an idiot??? CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW JOE MANTEGNA THREATENED KIEFER TO GET OUT OF TOWN AND STAY AWAY FROM RAPING/KILLING PEOPLE AND HE 1. WENT NOWHERE AND 2. RAPED AND KILLED ANOTHER BITCH?!?!? Like, wow, ya really scared him!! Ya really shook that blockhead nigga right the hell up!! Except you didn't?!?!?! At all?.!,?,..????

Sally is attending meetings for...people who have lost loved ones to violent crimes. A lot of them have similar stories of their loved ones getting killed, and no justice being served. Philip Baker Hall is at the meetings running some type of hitman service. Sally hits this nigga up for help; she wants to kill Kiefs. 

CAN WE PLEASE TALK ABOUT THAT BLACK BITCH SALLY BEFRIENDS WHO TURNS OUT TO BE A COP???? AND OMFG SHE LIED ABOUT HER SON DYING!! WHO DOES THAT SHIT?!?!?! AND WHO THE. FUCK. Excuse me, but did this bitch say she was part of some undercover task force trying to take down vigilantes?? WHAT! ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?! Look, I get that people can't just be out here in capes trying to get revenge on child molesters or whatever, but at the same time, I also don't get why they can't????? Like.........let's turn a blind eye to that shit because THERE IS WAY WORSE SHIT HAPPENING OUT IN THE WORLD YOU CAN BE FOCUSING ON. FOR INSTANCE, KIEFER SUTHERLAND RAPING AND KILLING A TEENAGE GIRL AND GETTING 100% AWAY WITH IT!!!!!!!!!!!!

Like, omfg, you can't be fucking actually serious. AND WHEN SALLY WENT TO THAT BITCH'S HOUSE AND HER SUPPOSEDLY DEAD SON WAS ALIVE AND FUCKING KICKING AND LITTLE NICKY FROM THE FRESH PRINCE OF BEL-AIR AND ALSO THAT BLACK BITCH WAS ON THE FRESH PRINCE AS WELL, RIGHT? ONE OF WILL'S AUNTS AND SHE HAD A WHITE HUSBAND PLAYED BY REX KWAN DO, RIGHT????

So Sally hooks up with Philip Baker Hall and Keith David who give her the Enough treatment, I guess? Like she's getting ready to slay the fuck out of Kiefer. That black chick is all like "don't do it" to Sally. EYEROLL. This...deters Sally for a bit, right? But then Kiefer kills that Latina woman he'd been serving groceries to when Sally was stalking him. There's not enough evidence to convict him of the crime, and Kiefer will get off again. Sally is like "lol nah", and gets ready to finish this nigga. There was a family trip planned to go to a lake or something, but Sally has to get out of it so she can stay behind and kill Kiefer. She pulls some stunt to make it look like she has to stay behind for work, and tells Ed, thoroughly done with her shit, that she'll meet up with them later after she's finished finding those files she hid lol. So it's go time!! When Sally is at Kiefer's apartment -- first, lol. It's gross. Also, who was...that woman in the photograph? It looked like he'd ripped the picture up and taped it back together. I assumed it was his mom. All serial killers are mommy's boys, this is 100% a fact I have done 0% research on. But it's likely completely fucking true. Why exactly does she go to his apartment, though? To leave her hat? Like evidence she was there so he'd want to go after her? I guess?? How did she know that would work? Also, it was so obvious, how could he be so dumb? Like Sally talks about how smarter he is than the cops...but I'm not even sure...he is. Like he sort of seems to not really be caring too much about getting caught at all. He's sloppy as fuck, imo, except for the gloves he wears, I guess. But the delivery man sort of rouse is pretty good, I think. Because it eliminates them being able to use his fingerprints as evidence. Also he uses a condom when he rapes the Latina woman. Right, but he didn't use one when he raped Sally's daughter??? So he's not actually smart, he just got lucky the first go-round and then was like to himself "lol better use a condy next time!!" like...

So, anyway, Kiefer is dumb, and shows up at Sally's house, for whatever reason, like ugh it's so obviously a trap you fucking idiot. But anyway he rips open the shower curtain like AHAH GOTCHU, except, no, she's standing behind you with a gun. I hate in movies when people with guns don't just fucking shoot. What's all the talky talky??? Why give your opponent a chance to distract you and get away?? She didn't even have to announce herself, she could've just shot this nigga in his back and it would've been done with. But I guess she wanted to confront him?? idk why. This nigga is a straight up one-dimensional monster and why are we bothering to get commentary from him, hmm???? 

So of course, because Sally doesn't immediately shoot him, Kiefer has a chance to push the gun away and they get into some tussling action. Meanwhile, Ed Harris is on the road driving to the lake house or whatever and I think he asks the daughter about her playdoh cookie. The daughter mentions how she saw Kiefer Sutherland at school and Ed is like D: DOES YOUR MOTHER KNOW??! And the girl tells him about how they met and Ed immediately u-turns that fucking car because he knew exactly what Sally was up to and that sort of redeemed him for me. Like, okay, you were paying attention to some extent, and you love Sally even though, obviously, you merely tolerated her pretentious ~~oooh I'm learning French~~~ ass daughter. Back at the house! Sally is shooting the shit out of Kiefs. And...his body falls on her?? Hmmmmm...wouldn't that have hurt a lot??? She simply rolls him off?? lol okay Sally Field weighs like 56 lbs soaking wet and Kiefer Sutherland looks a lil chunky, let's keep it real, so how was she just casually tossing his body off her? Maybe it was the way he fell?? Hmmm...idk...

When Ed turns up there's all these cop cars and shit and he and the daughter are pulling up in the car like "wtf what's all this?!?!!?". It was unintentionally funny?? Then Ed leaves the daughter in the car to run up to see wtf his wife has gotten into now and he sees Sally on the couch and sees dead ass Kiefer and basically he gets the gist. Then there's this weird extended moment where he's looking at Sally, then out to the car where the daughter is and it's like he's looking back and forth and they make it look like he's choosing between them? lol...but...why?? Anyway, he chose Sally, the end. Sucks for the alive daughter. Also I ship Sally and Joe Mantegna. They had chemistry. He was useless and she wasn't. Ying yang. I rated this movie an 8 on imdb. I rate movies on imdb. I feel weird about how I rated this movie, especially since its average is 6.1. Hmm...people have no taste and are trash, is my estimation.