Monday, January 13, 2014

Shameless S4 E1

Shameless is baaaaaaaaaaaack!
So much to talk about. Maybe, we'll see. I'll do a character breakdown.

Fiona: So, she's with her boss. I'll call him White cuz he's Caucasian as heck. DOESSSSS Fiona actually like this man? Or, is she sort of...just trying to get as far away from a Jimmy-type as possible? She seems almost detached from this whole thing. But, then after they had sex at his house she looked around and smiled when I thought she'd do a faraway "I'm thinking about Jimmy" look. Maybe...she was just souped to be in his upper middle class digs? Idk. I'll wait to see more of this before I start jumping to negative conclusions. But I am not here for this new beau. I was always Team Jimmy I don't care what his real fucking name is or what he did, I loved him you can definitely suck my penis. Actually, I'm secretly always Team Fiona and Lip 4ever. But probably they will never happen. This isn't The fucking Borgias. Sadly. (Only a little bit sadly because The Borgias was a fucking mess). 

Okay, let me jump over to Debbie real quick because they were definitely paralleling her with Fiona a couple of times in the episode with the morning beauty routine and then later with the texting of their beaus. So, Debbie thinks she's grown. This is a mostly accurate representation of THIRTEEN. Not for all thirteen year old girls, as I have unfortunately not had the pleasure to meet all of them, but definitely a huge chunk. She's become a ~sexual person~ and stuff. When I see stuff like this I try really hard to remember when I was thirteen. I was forever talking about blow jobs, though I'd die if I actually had to do one. To see Debbie flirting with this dude who has a car I'm just like GOD, NO, SHE'S A BABY. She's not really, but it's hard to watch. I'm really afraid they're going to have her losing her virginity this season and it's going to be a heartbreaking mess. But we'll see. Uggggggggh

Carl: It's weird how Debbie and Carl are only like a year apart. It totally illustrates that girls mature faster than boys narrative. I could never imagine Carl chattin' up some older girl in her car. Tho, I couldn't imagine Debbie doing it either BUT THERE IT HORRIBLY WAS. Anyway, Carl depresses me the most maybe. His attachment to Frank is...just...I can't. I get that Frank is his DAD. Like, it's the only one Carl has. But I really wish Carl could recognize that being a sperm donor does not make someone a father. Fiona is his dad. Let Frank go, ugh. I don't want that piece of garbage to bring him further down the humanity pole than he already is. Like, all Frank has to do is ask Carl to stick his finger up his ass to relieve a turd ball ONCE and that's it - Carl's a serial killer. The transformation is complete. Last season had me BAWLING when he shaved Frank's head in the hosptial, and it makes me feel bad for thinking Carl is a dumb ass for still loving Frank when everyone else has given up on him. I get that ~human relationships~ aren't as simple as that. (I get it because I read it on a blog somewhere. I don't know anything personally about human relationships myself). BUT FRANK DOESN'T CARE ABOUT CARL. WHY CAN'T CARL SEE?! HE ONLY CARES ABOUT HIMSELF!! (I definitely have personal experience/knowledge of narcissism. I read it on my face when looking in the mirror HAHAHahhuggh)

Kev & V: OH BOY. Everything V said to Fiona after she found out she was pregnant. I really hope she wasn't serious about having her mom get an abortion CUZ THAT AINT GOING DOWN HOW YOU THINK IT IS, SWEETCHEEKS. I still can't get over those eps with Kev fucking her mom. Don't tell me you went through all that disturbing shit just to throw that baby away because you're getting a clean one you acquired through less horrifying means. DON'T TELL ME THAT. (Just to be clear, I am pro-baby killing. Just not in this context. Give me all the mixed race babies! "Stop" - my brain to all my organs just now lol) Oh, also, what's going to happen with the owner of the bar who died? Is this going to get in the way of Kev's money? Because I was wondering why that was in any way significant. 

LIP: So Good Will Hunting is at college. I wonder how long that'll last. I do like him being the outcast at school and I think they should keep him there just because Lip @ College is rife with material. I loved the scene with the flashmob and him walking through it BECAUSE FUCK FLASH MOBS THAT SHIT IS GROSS. But I get that scene was meant to illustrate his ~aloneness~. Like, the only time we see him communicating in a friendly way is with his Hispanic dishwashing coworker. That was super pointed. Lip is my favesies so I hope him being at school doesn't mean less screentime. His trajectory is probably the best/most interesting one, so I hope it never lags or is diluted for other people to do more.  Like...for instance, Sheila?! 

Sheila: No idea. I like Sheila, so I'm not complaining, but her still being around miiiiiiight be stretching it. To be honest, it was probably always stretching it. But I love her stuff so hopefully they give her some significant shit to do this season NOT AT THE EXPENSE OF OTHER PEOPLE I CARE ABOUT MORE, THO. 

Who else? 

Mickey. Fucking Mickey. I wonder...if they're giving more spotlight to the Milkovich's. They're probably about to get into some crazy prostitution storyline, right? I think...I am interested in the Milkovich's. I hate all of them, but two of them (Mickey and Mandy) are connected to two Gallaghers I love...so...I want to understand them. I WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND MICKEY KICKING IAN IN HIS FUCKING FACE THO YOU WENT TOO FAR SHAMELESS. Mickey makes me so sad with his closeted bullshit. But seeing how his dad reacted when he found him and Ian fucking...I need to at least a little bit understand. But it's so hard! Speaking of hard, did he seriously leave Ian's pic in that magazine and then put it at the top of the pile? WHAT IF HIS DAD SITS DOWN TO SHIT AND OPENS UP THE MAG TO READ AND SEES THIS BEAUTIFUL ABERCROMBIE & FITCH PIC OF IAN SMILING BACK AT HIM?! Uh, hello dum-dum, anyone there?! 

I can't. I'm tired. 

Oh, shit. I forgot Frank. He needs to die. Like, is he seriously still alive? I love Frank sometimes, tho. I love a hot mess. But maybe I have a limit (True Blood, Dexter). I'll see what terribleness he has in store to enfold this season before I make my decision. What decision what the fuck am I talking about ugh

UM, SORRY, ALSO, CAN YOU BRING IAN BACK PLEASE?! OR CAN WE AT LEAST GET SOME DUMB ASS SCENES WITH HIM GETTING HAZED AT ARMY OR WHATEVER? GET WITH THE PROGRAM! 

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