The Lovers on the Bridge (1991)

So what is Denis Lavant? 

Not a human, correct?? He's super scary to me, but I think this is my first movie watching him, so I can't tell what kind of scary. I hope this doesn't awaken anything in me scary, or legit imagine Gary Busey going down on you scary??? Also, is he like...did he used to be in the circus? And not in that cool Burt Lancaster sort of way. Like, was he a freak? You know what I mean?? I could google it, but what if google tells me he actually did something classy. Like he was a trapeze artist or some shit, or was that dude who tightrope walked between the twin towers or whatever. Like, I don't want to find out he wasn't just a straight up carny. 

Denis plays some tramp named Alex. He really reminded me of like actual street vagrant types. Like it wasn't that ~*~Hollywood~*~ version of the homeless where they still have perfect, super-white teeth. Denis looks like he was straight up poached off the street by Leos Carax. He was lured to set by Leos waving a little baggie of heroin or some shit at him, that's what it looks like. So, good on for the realism. However, I was thoroughly disgusted. You're the ~*~romantic male lead~*~ and you look like some dude who sleeps in the sewers. Except this is a French film, so he sleeps on a bridge. Classy homeless. Of çourse. 

I can't tell what Alex's entire deal is. Every homeless person has a ~reason~ for living outside. Like, no one willingly wants to live outside except for legit psychopaths, ie: those nature freaks. People who want to be friends with fucking bears or tempt snakes to swallow them or some Australian ass shit like that. But Alex seems like he lives on the street because he's an addict? Oui? He looks very cracky, but I couldn't figure out what his exact poison was. Also it seemed like maybe he was...idk...sober from his main drug?? Ugh, I don't know. That older homeless dude kept giving him like methadone or some shit to fall asleep, right? Or, no, was it morphine?? If he was taking morphine to fall afuckingsleep, jesus. But whatever, Alex def seemed to have some sort of addiction issue. 

My baby girl Juliette Binoche comes through playing some going-blind bitch named Michèle. 

Remember when I used to severely hate Juliette Binoche?? FOR NO REASON. Ugh I hate when I'm dumb and deeply despise an actor and then all of a sudden one day I love them sosososo much and have no idea fucking ever why I hated them. And then sometimes it's too late because they fucking die! That happened with Philly Seymour Hoffman and omg I'm so mad. Like I started really loving him only a few months before he died and I. want. to. also. be. dead. Like I'll never forgive myself. But thank god Juliette is one of those immortal types and will never die. (I just jinxed her, right? Like, she's dying right now as I'm typing this). I wanted to see this movie for her. Well, I want to see all French movies ever always. Even the bad ones give me something, you know? (Nope.) So doubly exciting because FRENCH FILM and BINOCHE. 

Michèle is an artist. She draws and shit. Not totally clear why she's camping out on the bridge. It seems that maybe her boyfriend...broke up with her? No, I honestly have no idea. Because who is that woman who Alex sees when he breaks into...that apartment?? Was that Michèle's apartment and was that her lover?? Like, what was going on? Okay, and then, who was that dude she shot? Her ex-boo, right? Ugh soooo confused. And then also she's fucking going blind. And it sort of seems like she ran away from her family??? Also???? Maybe Michè--no, I don't know why I'm writing "maybe". Def Michèle has some mental issues going on. Because I feel like she clearly has housing options, but is choosing to sleep on the bridge. And she has health problems which makes it even more insane. But also it seems like maybe she's done some...wrong? And maybe that's why she ran away?? Was this made explicitly clear in the movie and I just wasn't paying attention enough? Like, did I sleep on the subtitles? I FEEL LIKE NO. I think Michèle's shit was intentionally vague. A lot of things in this movie were vague, I think. Also it seems like...there was some weird shit going on with the older dude? For some reason he felt like some older, mirror copy of Alex??? And then I see on imdb that maybe this movie is part of a ~series~?? Ugh, this is my first Leos Carax movie so I'm just lost. Though I doubt once I watch more of his shit things will be cleared up for me. Like, am I going to get his vision? Prob nah.

Was I into the ~love story~? Maybe? I felt bad for Alex, and that always helps. It's good to feel really bad for one half of a couple, especially if it's the dude in a straight coupling. I don't know why, it just does. I don't know about calling it a love story, though. Like, did Michèle even love Alex? The minute she heard on the radio there was a surgery she could get for her eyes, she fucking dipped. I mean, she  came back eventually, but also she was planning on leaving again??? Michèle is super manic pixie dream girl, but like the reverse. Like she doesn't help guide the male lead to betterness or whatever, she possibly worsens his life??? I DON'T KNOW, MY PAL. 

This movie was really pretty, though!!

Shit was gross and everyone looked disgusting, but it was also super beautiful?? I loved that fireworks scene. And I loved when Alex set fire to those posters. 

Like, cool. Cool unsarcastically. Unsarcastically isn't a word, but it motherfucking should be, spellcheck!!

Also, at one point, Juliette Binoche is rocking Uma Thurman's tracksuit from Kill Bill for some reason??

I am...into this. 

So I loved the sexy/ugly (French) look of the movie, and I loved the performances. Like Juliette and that freak Denis sort of served me it. Especially Juliette. Like she was really giving me too much. Too much in a good way. Overall, though, it was cool for me when the movie ended. This movie made me feel that feeling I get when I go out at night in the wintertime. Like, it's cold and dark. Can't get inside fucking fast enough where the only light source is not coming from the glaring red eyes of a possum. Huh, I should start going to therapy. Or, join a club!! The Boys & Girls Club of America? Yes, I like little kids.